WHY I FOUNDED GIFTHEIR

Growing up in New York City, I had two favorite aunts. One, Aunt Connie, was my father’s sister, the other, my Aunt Leyla, was my mother’s sister.  

Tragically, when I was 14, my Aunt Connie was struck by a car and killed on Christmas eve. After she passed away, her son, Phillip, gave me her gold bangle, which has her name engraved on it. I was told it was very special to Aunt Connie because it was given to her by the man she was planning to marry following her first failed marriage. At first, it was sad that I received the bracelet upon her death, I'd much rather she was still alive. As I grew older, I treasured it knowing that my Aunt Connie wore the bracelet. I think of her every time I wear it and am reminded of how sweet, fun-loving and special she was to me. I didn’t know it then but looking back she loved me unconditionally.

As a young adult I moved to California and gradually my trips “home” to NY became less frequent, but I always stayed close with my Aunt Leyla. One time, when I was visiting her, as I left her apartment to go back to where I was staying, she pressed a gold ring that I had always admired into my palm. I never saw her without it. At first, I tried to insist she keep it—it felt like she was saying goodbye for good, and I didn’t want that, but she persisted; and so I graciously accepted it. I am happy to say she lived many more happy years after that day, but like the bracelet…not a day goes by that I don’t think about her especially because I wear it often. Of course, now I understand the value of both gifts to me. They are a symbol of the relationship I had with each and I cherish both and their memories. I want others to be able to have this experience.

Cautionary Uncle Tale

I also got to see first-hand what happens when the distribution of personal property is not documented when I acted as my uncle’s executor. Unfortunately, without his written, documented express desires there were fights among the family members over items and those rifts led to estrangement that is still persistent 20 years later.

The last impetus for GiftHeir is bittersweet. I had a colleague, Patty, who became a great friend in a short amount of time. Unfortunately, she was diagnosed with cancer and was not able to be cured. Prior to her death, she earmarked gifts for her friends that were items that belonged to her. After she died, I received beautiful art deco earrings that were given to her by the love of her life. Every time I dress up and wear them I think, “Patty is joining me at this party and she loved a party!”

Each of these stories is different, one happened after an unexpected fatal accident, another happened while the person was still alive, one happened despite the existence of a Will, and the last one came from a friend that knew she was dying. These experiences made me realize the importance of acknowledging the people in your lives who are special to you by making your wishes known. A Will helps with the disposal of your estate, but rarely do people list out all of their personal possessions to earmark them due to the cost of doing so. Most truly special possessions are not valuable, but rather sentimental. Even when given away upon death, or a debilitating illness the stories about the items are often lost. Let's not wait until death or impairment to acknowledge the ones we love and hand-down our treasures and stories.GiftHeir is born out of those experiences: Acknowledge those who have been special in your life, promote family harmony and preserve the story of items that have meaning in your life.  Every day, I strive to help people find peace and lead better lives through innovative uses of technology.

Mercedes De Luca

Co-Founder, GiftHeir